Incomplete Thoughts

From π to Zack and Miri: Part 19: 24 Season 1 3:00PM-4:00PM

2010-03-01T11:28:00.000-05:00

Bob is dead. Jack discovers the angel Castiel is an assassin looking to kill Palmer and Jack. Elizabeth recognizes Castiel when they are all shown the men believed to be behind the assassination attempt. Jack changes his clothing. Jack thinks there is another mole inside CTU. Keith Palmer is angry and wants a meet with Carl about Feragamo's death. The bad guy breaks into the safe house and starts killing agents. Teri and Kim escape. Teri stops the car to get out and look around. The car falls off of a cliff and explodes, apparently killing Kim. Teri passes out. And when Teri comes to, Abby Sciuto pulls over to help her. Damn it, apparently Kim is still alive, meaning I will have to watch her eventually be menaced by cougars.

And thus we begin this season's really stupid storyline. Guess what? Teri has amnesia! Yes, we get Teri wandering around with no memory of who she is or what has been happening to her. Oh, this will be such a great storyline. Oh wait, no it won't. Terrible idea. Just terrible.

From π to Zack and Miri: Part 18: 24 Season 1 2:00PM-3:00PM

2010-02-24T12:07:00.000-05:00

Jack continues his interrogation. We see some angelic love. Palmer and Jack meet face to face. Teri and Kim make it to the safe house. Teri finds out she is pregnant. And Teri and Kim eat. The majority of the episode has Jack and Palmer sitting in a room investigating the Drazen incident and who is behind the assassination attempt. Palmer gets Bauer reinstated. The episode ends with a death you see coming all episode long.

Another sitting around talking episode, this time between Jack and Palmer. it is still about setting up the rest of the season, and the problem is you cannot rush through the events since the whole concept is real time. It is fun to watch, and they keep some tension going with Jack and Palmer hunting for the men behind the attack. Overall, not a bad episode.

Kim is stupid. First, she wonders how the rape several hours ago already got her mother pregnant. And then she bitches that her parents were trying to get pregnant without telling her. Since, I guess, that is the only way to get pregnant. How did Kim get Rick's phone number when she had never met him before?

From π to Zack and Miri: Part 17: 24 Season 1 1:00PM-2:00PM

2010-02-23T13:51:00.000-05:00

Kim and Teri are escorted to a hospital, while CTU takes Jack into custody. The fallout from the first thirteen hours of the season continues. The angel Castiel kills the rest of Gaines' men, including Kevin Carroll. Palmer believes Jack is blaming him for the Drazen incident. Actually, it's the Drazens blaming both of them. One of Palmer's staff is sleeping with Castiel, because of his angelic radiance. Palmer arrives at CTU to talk to Jack.

A talky episode. This is all about the fallout of the first half of the season. Jack is held in custody and questioned the entire hour. Teri and Kim spend the hour in the hospital being examined, joined by Nina to watch over them. And Palmer digs into the whys for the events of the day. It is more setting up the players for the rest of the day, as well as providing filler as the creators of the show realized they still have a lot of episodes left to go.

From π to Zack and Miri: Part 16: 24 Season 1 12:00PM-1:00PM

2010-02-22T13:31:00.000-05:00

Jack Bauer continues his efforts to stop the assassination attempt on Senator David Palmer. Since last minute, he is running from Gaines after the truck exploded. Teri and Kim remain running from Gaines. And Palmer is still pissed about Feragamo's death. Teri shows that as a woman, she has a hard time following simple directions. And the 24 hours in Jack Bauer's life continues. Tony and Nina eat food, proving they are weaker than Jack, who can survive for days on anger. Ted runs away and Jack kills Gaines. Rick escapes. The episode ends with a second assassin, the angel Castiel, to prove that there are eleven episodes left.

The ending to the Gaines story is exciting enough, and all of the storylines are starting to heat up. Palmer's storyline about his son is getting into cover ups and an angry Palmer. There are several wrap ups as the episode ends, but more loose ends are uncovered, leading to the rest of the season. But, as it's 24, not too much can happen.

Jack kills the asian bad guy. He uses the power of the sun to defeat a sniper rifle. Jack kills Gaines.

Jack ups the body count for the season by two more.

Christopher Chance vs the Pulp Trope

2010-02-19T13:47:00.000-05:00

The Human Target, Fox's new show based loosely on the DC comic, has had complaints from fans of the comic about the disparities between the comic and the television. The television show does share ideas with another property, the pulp magazine. The main character Christopher Chance follows the majority of the tropes of the pulp hero of old. Human Target is helping to fill in the void of the pulp storyline for today's modern audience in the manner of the Doc Savage style hero.

Pulps were stories told in a magazine format. They were cheaply priced, printed on cheap paper, the books falling apart soon after the first read through. The pulps featured such characters as Doc Savage. The heroes that grew out of Doc Savage's style of pulp were a specific set. These heroes would be faced against villains with high stakes on the line. They would often be joined by a variety of assistants each with their own specialized skills. Yet the hero himself would be just as skilled in many of the specializations that him companions are in as well. The companions are loyal to the hero. And the hero would often be faced with bigger threats from new villains in every new issue, with the villain often defeated and the characters back to their iconic set up at the beginning of the next story.

One factor that helped in defining the pulp hero were his fighting skills. Often, they would be trained in multiple martial arts. They would be strong, often stronger than a normal man. They would be faced against masters of martial arts, dispensing with the attackers with ease, proving themselves stronger, faster, and more skilled. They also are shown as intelligent and capable in all disciplines, from science to law to history to whatever else the story needs him to be. He will appear to gain new knowledge and skills as the story dictates, as any problem the hero comes across he will be shown to have full knowledge of the area of study and prove himself more than capable of solving the problem. The pulp hero is all of these qualities and more.

Christopher Chance in Human Target possesses these same qualities. He is capable in a fight with as many men as he can. He has taken on from one trained assassin to a group of crooked police officers. No matter the odds or training of his enemies, Chance has proven himself the more capable. Chance has also proven his driving ability, escaping from pursuers. He proved his capabilities in leading a monastery in prayer, quoting biblical verse. When a pilot is needed on an airline, he took over the flight control, including rolling the plane over to douse flames from the bottom of the plane. When pretending to be a lawyer, he was able to quote court cases that proved his point from memory. And when dealing with an engineer aboard a train, he proved himself her equal in engineering knowledge. He has shown strong knowledge in every area of the person he is protecting. And yet when asked by each person who he is hired to protect, he always tells them he is not whatever profession he is showing expert knowledge in.

The pulp hero also has friends who help him along the way. While the pulp hero is capable in all things, these friends are the best at what they do. They are often the top surgeon in the world. Or they are the world's smartest man. Often, the pulp hero travels with an engineer who can build him almost anything. There is a lawyer who is unbeaten or has only lost one case. Usually there is a strong guy who is sometimes shown to be stronger than the hero, but at other times the hero will match him during play with each other. And oftentimes there might be a faithful companion, who follows the hero and tends to him, much in the same way as Alfred does for Batman. No matter how many or few, the hero's friends usually play a role in assisting the hero overcome the villain and help win the day, even through it is the hero who is given the credit for the win.

Christopher Chance has two such people in his life, who help him through each of his adventures. First, there is Winston, Chance's friend and business partner. Winston is a former police detective, retired but still with the knowledge from the job. He helps set up Chase with his clients as well as supplying support for Chance when needed, using his contacts and skills to assist Chance in each case. He is both Alfred, and more. Chance's second compatriot is Guerrero. Guerrero is a master at computers, he has hooks in all parts of not exactly legal affairs. He is mysterious, and he can solve almost every problem presented with. He has also used his skills and shaky morality to save Chance from having secrets exposed, as well as protecting Chance in other ways. While Guerrero seems to possess no morality, he is fiercely loyal to Chance, as the companions often are.

The last commonality between Human Target and the classic pulps is the larger than life stories. In the original stories, the hero would face some world or city conquering menace. But the important thing was not so much the goals, as the trials created for the hero to pass. Whether the hero was aboard a burning zeppelin, or in an underground base, he would have to use his wits and skills to escape what should be certain death. While there is no yellow menace (thankfully), each week Chance must help someone get out of a ridiculous situation they have been placed in, often by villains with big plans. From Chance on a speeding train without brakes to an airplane out of control to being chased by the San Francisco poise department Chance must fight these menaces, using his assistants to get him through each problem. He takes control of the situations and finds ways out of flying, speeding, or inescapable deathtraps.

The one thing Human Target is lacking is the nemesis. He does not yet have an enemy who keeps coming back time and again to harass him, although even that has been hinted at, with a mysterious third party having hired Guerrero to steal the files to Chance's first case. While Guerrero accepted the job in an effort to learn the identity of the mysterious villain, the job ended with the contact dead, the files destroyed, and the villain still a mystery from Guerrero and the audience. Whether this person will become a nemesis for our hero or not, only the future can tell.

Looking through the criteria that helped define the pulp hero of the Doc Savage mold, Christopher Chance fits inside of the mold rather easily. He is capable in almost all things, he has companions who assist him during his adventures, and his adventures often contain crazy situations that should lead to certain death and yet he finds a way out. Christopher Chance would find no difficulty in fitting in with the world of the other pulp heroes, and that is what makes his adventures enjoyable.

From π to Zack and Miri: Part 15: 24 Season 1 11:00AM-12:00PM

2010-02-12T12:29:00.002-05:00

Jack Bauer finds his wife and daughter, saving the day. Of course, Gaines is coming after him and there is still loads of trouble. Also, there is this Drazen guy hanging around to fill in the bad guy role. Green decides to interrogate Nina and Tony. Because the first thing we need the day of a Presidential candidate assassination is to take away half of the CTU work force. Palmer is worried for Keith's therapist, and when he goes to visit, the therapist is dead. Jack calls Green to give his location, and he lets Nina and Tony off the hook. Rick gets shot and Jack helps him escape.

Jack beats up Kevin. He throat punches the fake Alan. He chokes Rick. He is involved in a van chase through the Gaines property. He blows the van up.

Kim sticks up for Rick.

No one dies, strangely enough since everyone is shooting at each other.

From π to Zack and Miri: Part 14: 24 Season 1 10:00AM-11:00AM

2010-02-12T12:29:00.001-05:00

Jack Bauer, on the run from the government and hunting down Ira Gaines continues to torture and now kill to get his family back. Ted gets a call from Kevin Carroll, who Jack finds out was the fake Alan. Teri shoots and kills her rapist, then hides the body.

Drazen explains that Gaines was supposed to set up Bauer as Palmer's assassin. Again, there are easier ways to do this. Gaines made it way too difficult. Which is why he fails. Also, we get the line "There's no way you could have seen that coming". Huh? Of course you could, because the whole plan was ridiculous to begin with.

Jack mentions Gulag torture with a wet towel. He disarms Ted's knife and heart punches Ted, killing the other man. He then tortures Kevin Carroll by driving a limo. Yes, torture by limo ride.

Kim declines the gun given to her.

Jack kills Ted. Teri kills her rapist.

From π to Zack and Miri: Part 13: 24 Season 1 9:00AM-10:00AM

2010-02-12T12:29:00.000-05:00

Jack Bauer continues the hunt for his wife and daughter and the mastermind (yeah, right) behind framing him for the attempted assassination of Senator David Palmer. Teri, now armed with a cell phone, calls Nina and they start a trace. Jack gets in on the call to tell everyone how much he loves them. (But not that bitch Nina anymore.) The cell phone dies and the bad guy finds it, but decides not to tell Gaines he had it stolen, since he is an idiot. The first Drazen appears flying on a plane. CTU gets told tha Alberta Green will replace Jack as head. Jack gets information on Ted Coffel and kidnaps him in the limousine. Oh, and Teri has her first bout of morning sickness.

Jack hot wires a car. He sets off a fire alarm. He steals a limo. He would rather spend more time talking to his family while under a car than escape from the police. But the police never bother to look under the cars in the parking lot, nor do they notice him drive out of the parking lot while they look for him.

Kim is given one job, watch out for bad guys. Which she never actually does. Thankfully, the bad guys are loud and they can hide the cell phone.

Jamey dies in this episode from her self-inflicted injuries sustained in the previous episode.

From π to Zack and Miri: Part 12: 24 Season 1 8:00AM-9:00AM

2010-02-11T13:40:00.002-05:00

The opening no longer tells us that the show takes place in real time. How are we supposed to know if it takes place in real time, then? Jack Bauer, more human than human, continues to fight the man and discover the reason behind the assassination attempt on David Palmer's life. Nina and Tony work to help Jack escape from the police. Because Jack Bauer is above the police. Teri steals a cell phone off of her raper. Jamey slits her wrists with a broken coffee cup to end the episode.

Jack steals a car. He tells a woman he kidnapped "I have killed two people since midnight" and that she should be afraid of him. Jack falls asleep for a brief moment.

Because Kim faked her rape earlier, she gets almost raped in this episode. Instead, her mother Teri gets raped. Way to go Kim. Way to go.

Again, no one dies in this episode. This has been way too many episodes without a death in it.

From π to Zack and Miri: Part 11: 24 Season 1 7:00AM-8:00AM

2010-02-11T13:32:00.001-05:00

Jack Bauer, the only hope for humanity continues his mission to rescue his family and save David Palmer while working for the bad guys and falls further into the depths of what he will become. Meanwhile, Nina is still pretending to be good, even getting Tony to capture that traitor Jamey when Jamey lies about Nina, thinking Nina is dead. Tony then calls Aaron Pierce to warn him of Jack being at Palmer's speech. Finally, Jack saves the day and gets arrested for it.

This episode parks the first time the previously on calls it the worst day of Jack's life. Jack also builds a gun for the assassin and attacks a Secret Service agent. Jack keeps it kind of cool in this episode.

Kim gets led to her possible death when Jack screws up the assassination attempt. She goes almost willingly.

No one gets killed in this episode.

From π to Zack and Miri: Part 10: 24 Season 1 6:00AM-7:00AM

2010-02-07T11:42:00.000-05:00

This episode marks another first, as it is the first time Jack utters the works "I will kill you". Unlike later on, this is said in a quiet voice, as Jack is saying it to Nina. The fake photographer prepares for the assassination. Jack follows Gaines' orders and heads to CTU. No one at CTU is suspicious of Jack, since I guess he randomly walks around the office talking to himself with his finger pressed to his ear. Nothing suspicious about that at all. Jack kidnaps Nina and throws a jacket on her. Teri escapes from "Alan" and winds up knocking him out and tying him up. But when she calls CTU Jamey answers because Nina is out with Jack. Teri gets jealous, figuring they are having sex again and plots to kill Pa- oh wait, that's not what happens. What happens is Jamey says she is sending CTU agents to pick up "Alan". But, when the agents arrive, they turn out to be bad guys, and we find out Jamey was the mole all along! Of course, I will get back to this later. Gaines has Jack drive outside of LA, and has him shoot Nina. Jack shoots Nina and she falls down a hill. Dead? No! Jack was smart enough to put a flak jacket on her and Nina gets up alive. Of course, if Jack would have just killed her, he would have saved himself from the heartache at the end of the season, but Jack can't think past each hour.

OK, so Jamey is Gaines' mole. So, why couldn't she have just deleted the information on the key card when she first had it? Why do we need Jack to go back and get the key card, making everyone in CTU suspicious of him? Once again, Gaines has a plan that is far too complex. And when we find out what the actual plan is, we have to wonder why not just do it an easier way?

Dead Janet: Still dead.

Jack Moments: Jack steals the key card from under Milo's nose. He kidnaps Nina. He says "I will kill you."

Kim Moments of Stupidity: She fakes a rape with Rick, which ends up causing bad things later. When she fake escapes, she doesn't bother to lock the door behind her. If someone looked, they would have known she was gone without going in. She stops her escape and heads back to the shack to stay kidnapped.

Body Count:

Bauer: 0 Bad Guys: 0

Season Total:

Bauer: 2 Bad Guys: 264

From π to Zack and Miri: Part 9: 24 Season 1 5:00AM-6:00AM

2010-02-04T11:14:00.001-05:00

Janet, after flat lining, comes back, and is said to be fine. Jack arrives at the hospital to reunite with Teri briefly. David "One more Major League joke and I will send Bob to kill you" Palmer is angry over the fact that everyone knew about what his son did except for him. Such a close family, keeping secrets from the man who would be the most powerful man in the world! (Once he learns to hit a curve ball.) Mike Novick makes his first appearance, consoling Palmer over the fact that he's oblivious. Gaines calls Jack and uses Kim to force Jack to follow his orders. "Alan" goes to Janet's room and kills Janet. Milo is called in to help with the key card, marking Milo's first appearance. The sun finally rises. And Nina calls Teri and tells her to tell Jack the body belongs to Alan Yorke. But if Alan is dead, then who is in the car with her? Beep Boop Beep Boop.

A strong set up episode for the rest of the current storyline. Jack has to go against CTU and the government to protect his family. And we get more of this set up next week.

Dead Janet: Flat lines. Has her air cut from her oxygen mask by her fake dad. Dies.

Jack Moments: Steals a helicopter to go to the hospital. Attacks a man carrying a briefcase in the hospital.

Kim Moments of Stupidity: Helps Rick bury Dan. Is left alone to dig the grave.

Body Count:

Bauer: 0 Bad Guys: 1

Season Total:

Bauer: 2 Bad Guys: 264

From π to Zack and Miri: Part 8: 24 Season 1 4:00AM-5:00AM

2010-02-04T01:21:00.000-05:00

Jack is at the police station trying to talk to the bad guy. He helps the guy to escape so he can find out about Kim. Teri and "Alan" go to the hospital and find Janet in surgery. Jack gets blocked by Mason several times. Teri is the first person to fall prey to being tired and closes her eyes for a moment. David "Unit" Palmer threatens the reporter to not tell her story yet. She does not give in. The bad guy leads Jack to a car with a body in it. Dan gets killed by Gaines for being stupid.

Poor Janet: Flat lines while in surgery.

Jack Moments: Smothers the suspect. Passes phone number to suspect. Assists suspect in escaping police custody.

Kim Moments of Stupidity: Thrown into a trunk. Gets Dan killed.

Body Count:

Jack: 0 Bad Guys: 2

Season Total:

Jack: 2 Bad Guys: 263

From π to Zack and Miri: Part 7: 24 Season 1 3:00AM-4:00AM

2010-02-03T11:13:00.000-05:00

This episode is notable as the first time Jack carries a gun and a flashlight at the same time. Also, Mason asks "What's so special about Jack Bauer?" Tony, being a dick, calls Mason in who initiates a lock down of CTU. Jack escapes and heads to an address that was pulled from the key card. A black female police officer helps Jack in his hunt and gets shot and killed for her assistance. When Mason learns Jack's whereabouts he unlocks CTU and leaves. David "Allstate" Palmer and Pierce convene to discuss safety concerns. The bad guy tells Jack of Kim's abduction.

Poor Janet: Left for dead in the middle of the street. Is almost shot but is saved by ambulance.

Jack Moments: Punches CTU agent. Uses a flashlight and a gun. Uses Spanish and a tackle to catch the bad guy. Gets police officer killed.

Kim Moments of Stupidity: Dragged away from Janet. Tied up in back of van. Persists enough about Janet being hurt that Dan decides to shoot her to make sure she is dead.

Body Count:

Jack: 0 Bad Guys: 1

Season Total:

Jack: 2 Bad Guys: 261

From π to Zack and Miri: Part 6: 24 Season 1 2:00AM-3:00AM

2010-02-02T20:15:00.000-05:00

This episode marks the first time Jack yells out "Who are you working for?" Apart from that, the intrigue into the possible assassination of David "Curveball, bats are afraid" Palmer and the abduction of Kim continue on.

Pierce is searching for Palmer. He also has to keep the rest of the Palmer family in the suite, when David's son Keith tries to leave. We learn that Gaines wants Kim for some nefarious plot, which I will get to later. Jack interrogates Nina, but learns that the key card accessed her computer the week that Jack was sleeping with her out of town, so having sex cleared Nina. Palmer delivers a PSA to some hoodlums about rising up out of the gutter and becoming men. "Join the Unit." Kim attempts an escape with cracked up, broken armed, roofied Janet which leads to Janet getting hit by a car. And Mandy's girlfriend gets killed when she shows up without the ID and wants another million dollars for it. Again, why not bring the ID in the first place? Why give it to someone else to bring when you had it yourself, Mandy?

OK, so Gaines wants to kidnap Kim. So, his idea is to get two guys who Kim does not know, have one of those guys have sex with her friend Janet and then convince her to bring a friend along to the furniture store. First, Dan has to sleep with Janet. Then, he has to know she would bring Kim. But it's not like he can say "If you have any friends named Kim Bauer bring them along with you." And we have been told Kim has never met these guys before. So, this is a lot of work and luck to kidnap her and get Teri riding around town with "Alan York". Why go to all of the trouble with the Yorks for this? Why not just grab Kim and Teri at home while they are asleep and defenseless?

Poor Janet: Has a broken arm and has been roofied. Gets shot up with crack. Hit by a car which drives away. Is left to die in the middle of the road.

Jack Bauer Moments: "WHO ARE YOU WORKING FOR?" Lies to everyone at CTU. Interrogates Nina because someone accessed her computer (It's not like the computers are secure, people run back and forth across them all the time).

Kim Bauer Moments of Stupidity: Allows Janet crack, asks crack whore prostitute boy for help, asks skeevy guy in alley for help, gets prostitute boy beaten (possibly to death), gets Janet hit by a car, gets recaptured.

Body Count:

Jack: 0 Bad Guys: 1

Season Total:

Jack: 2 Bad Guys: 260

From π to Zack and Miri: Part 5: 24 Season 1 1:00AM-2:00AM

2010-02-02T12:33:00.002-05:00

The threat on Senator David "Hats for bats" Palmer continues. Walsh, Jack's mentor character gets into trouble securing a key card with information to the conspiracy. The other agent is killed and Walsh calls to Jack for help. Secret Service agent Aaron Pierce makes his first appearance to beef up security around Palmer. Palmer has left his suite, though. Jack acquires the key card, with Walsh dying in the process, setting up the long line of characters near Jack who die. Jack then gets Jamey at CTU to start working on the key card. Jamey links the card to Nina. Is Nina bad? (Hint: she is, but not at this point in the season.) Oh, and Mandy gets naked for no real reason. She also buries the photographer's ID. Again, for no real reason other than to extend the plot out.

The plan, apparently, is her girlfriend is supposed to pick up the ID while Mandy is being driven away by Gaines, and then immediately drive it to where Gaines is driving. I guess it could be to make sure Gaines has the money, but then why have her pick it up so quick? Or why not get the money and then give Gaines the tracking device? Instead, the idea is just way too complicated.

We do get some of Jack in action in this episode, as he kills two of the men attacking Walsh. The intrigue of who is the spy withing CTU is still interesting at this point in the series, as it has not been done yet. And the fact that we bounce between all of these characters feels less like filler and more like it is building to something. Kim gets kidnapped, her first of many. But the series is still trying to find its way. Teri meets with Janet's "father" and the two head out to search for their daughters. And poor Janet gets roofied, then has her arm broken.

Jack Bauer Moments: Jack shoots two of the attackers and cuts off one of their thumbs. Jack leaves Walsh to die.

Kim Bauer Moments of Stupidity: Goes into van with the boys. She gets kidnapped. She then calls her mother when threatened and lies that she is at a party having fun.

Body Count:

Jack Bauer: 2 Bad Guys: 2

Season Total:

Jack Bauer: 2 Bad Guys: 259

From π to Zack and Miri: Part 4: 24 Season 1 12:00AM-1:00AM

2010-02-02T01:00:00.000-05:00

On the day of the California Presidential Primary there is a threat on Senator David Palmer's life. Jack Bauer and the rest of CTU(Counter Terrorist Unit) are called in to assess the threat and help prevent the assassination. Meanwhile, a photographer is on an airplane seated next to Mia Kirshner, and Jack's daughter Kim sneaks out of the house to party at a furniture store.

The first thing that shocked me with this episode is how much different everyone looks. Jack Bauer is softer looking, he talks in a calm voice and is believable being in charge of the CTU office. Tony Almeida is thin with a soul patch. And Nina is working for CTU. Oh, and Jack's wife Teris is walking around alive and everything. The other shock is that the season actually begins in Kuala Lampur. Right after we are told everything takes place in real time California time we are then taken to not LA. The second thing is everyone with a laptop is using a MacBook. The last strange thing is seeing how bad cell phone reception was at the beginning of the season, as characters lose reception on several occasions.

Most of the episode is set up of CTU working in the office, Teri being worried about Kim, Kim partying with her friend Janet having sex in a bed in the store, and David "Pedro Cerrano" Palmer preparing for his day ahead with the Primary. The girl on the plane steals the photographer's ID, then jumps out of the plane and blows the plane up, killing everyone aboard, but not before having sex with the photographer.

Jack Bauer Moments: Jack shoots George Mason in the neck with a tranquilizer dart.

Kim Bauer Moments of Stupidity: Kim sneaks out of the house to party with two creepy looking boys she does not know at a furniture store.

Body Count:

Jack Bauer: 0 Bad Guys: 257

From π to Zack and Miri: Part 3: 12 Monkeys

2010-02-01T11:00:00.003-05:00

From mastermind and former Monty Python Terry Gilliam, comes this film on the nature of mental illness and destiny. The first movie in my collection that I have already watched, it was still just as interesting to go back and watch it again after years. There is so much going on in the movie the next time I watch it there will probably be something new I see.

12 Monkeys stars Bruce Willis as James Cole, a man from thirty years in the future from 1996. At the end of 1996 a virus was unleashed upon the Earth, killing five billion humans, and forcing the rest into hiding underground. Cole is selected to go back in time to learn more about who created the virus, so the scientists from the future can collect a pure sample and develop a cure. The time travel, however, has strong side effects on the mind.

Upon this latest viewing of the movie I noticed just how much of the movie deals with Cole's mental deterioration. Every trip back and forth in time unhinges his mind more. A portion of the movie is set in a mental hospital, and the character fits right in with the other patients. Cole is prone to outbursts of violence, placing police officers and orderlies in the hospital, and even beats a man to death. The character's mental state deteriorates and he loses all sense of reality, being dragged along by others for the final act of the movie, as he is incapable of continuing on his own.

On the opposite side is Brad Pitt's Jeffrey Goines. Goines is mentally unstable, and starts the movie in the mental hospital where his character belongs. While his mental state does not get better, he learns to act the part of the good son, of the animal rights activist leader, and reaches a point where he can operate in society. Meanwhile, under his seeming sanity is the insanity ready to be unleashed.

And then there is the character of Dr. Kathryn Railly. She begins the movie by treating the mental psychoses of Cole and Goines. But, after events with Cole she begins to question his reality and jumps into the insanity, losing pieces of herself in the process. She goes so far as to convince Cole of his reality, leading him along to the ending. She encourages the possible insanity.

While the questions in the movie are not explored, they are asked. One character asks another whether Railly has created her own subversive reality from Cole's. Railly continually questions Cole's grip on what is real. And we learn that Goines, while not fully sane, is at least aware of reality and what his actions are. All of the characters are insane to some point, it is just how they deal with their insanity that sets each of them apart from each other.

Next: 24 Season 1 12:00AM-1:00AM

From π to Zack and Miri: Part 2: 3 Extremes

2010-01-27T14:04:00.003-05:00

From Hong Kong director Fruit Chan, Korean director Park Chan-Wook, and Japanese director Takashi Miike comes this anthology of demented stories. An alternate opening sentence can be: it is a movie from those crazy asians.

Fruit Chan's segment "Dumplings" comes first, and it centers on a woman wanting eternal youth and the measures she will go to achieve her goals. She visits a mysterious woman in an apartment who makes special dumplings that are said to restore youth and beauty. As the woman becomes more obsessed with eating the dumplings and regaining her smooth skin from her youth, more about how the dumplings are made is also brought to light. Knowing that the title is 3 Extremes should clue you in on what is going on, but if you don't guess early, hints are dropped in, then you are hit over the head with the cook's other line of work, and then just shown the whole thing. Of course, the story is more about what price beauty than being shocked, and the main character will do anything for her beauty, as is found out while watching this segment.

The second segment is Park Chan-Wook's "Cut", about a director who is nothing but nice to the cast and crew of the horror movie he is making. But when he arrives home, which the movie set is an exact replica of, he is attacked and wakes up to find himself back on set. His kidnapper, already having kidnapped his wife, then begins a mental torture of the director to stop the man from being so nice.

The final segment is Takashi Miike's "Box". This segment focuses on a young writer who was a ballet/contortionist with her sister at a young age, with their finale being they would fold up into boxes and disappear. Like most of Miike's work, this is at times confusing, with strange events and fever dream logic flowing throughout, before leading to a just as strange closing.

The one advantage this anthology has is three top directors working on it. The cameras are set up wonderfully, the lighting works, and the sound design fits. These are three directors at the tops of their game. The actors are also very good. These are top notch productions.

But none of the segments are particularly great. "Dumplings" takes a one note concept and plays it out as far as they can take it. "Cut" is a basic Tales From the Crypt episode. And "Box" is a calm version of Miike. Miike is Miike, love him or hate him. And here he spends long sequences with silence, which as it does in most of his work lead to some strange places later in the story.

Overall, this anthology is one of the better anthology movies out there. There is no overarching storyling forcing things together, nor cheap bookends for the story. Instead, we get three decent tales told one after another, the only connecting point being they are all a bit crazy.

Included in the set is a full feature version of "Dumplings". The feature version lays the clues out stronger starting from the beginning, lines that were cut to keep some measure of mystery are back in, and certain characters are shown to be participating in their activities on extra occasions so as to hammer home what kind of person they are. The feature version is interesting, but suffers from too much extra material, working better in the condensed version.

Next: 12 Monkeys

From π to Zack and Miri: Part 1: π

2010-01-26T13:40:00.003-05:00

From writer/director/mastermind/Rachel Weiss plaything Darren Aronofsky comes his feature film. And the future Aronofsky can be seen in this early offering.

Max Cohen is obsessed with patterns. He believes everything in the universe has a numerical pattern attached to it. His theory is there is a pattern in the stock market. His sole friend is another scientist who was attempting to discover a pattern in π. The colleague gave up his quest after a stroke. And he tries to convince Max to give up the chase over games of Go. But Max does find a pattern and predicts the stock market, an event which causes his computer to crash, but not before spitting out a 216 digit number. At first, Max throws the print out away.

But it turns out the number is some all powerful number, and as Max tries to get access to the number again he is beset by all manner of people interested in the acquisition of the number. Max also suffers from headaches and delusions brought on by the headaches, which make certain events of the movie questionable. The ending also plays out interesting, being perhaps the only Aronofsky film that does not try to be a downer.

The acting in the film is decent, about the level of the film as a small budget first time film. The actors are good. But the real shining points are the directing and the sound design. Aronofsky proves he can direct with this film. The image is often stark and locations are interesting, especially Max's apartment.

Then there is the sound design. The music kicks in at the right times, using one general theme but mixing it up throughout to never make it boring. And it always works for what is happening in the movie. The sound in the movie is amazing for the small budget style of the film.

Overall, π is a good movie, and a good start from Aronofsky. I'm glad I watched it.

Next: 3 Extremes

From π to Zack and Miri: The Start

2010-01-25T01:58:00.003-05:00

From π to Zack and Miri will be my plan to actually sit down and watch each movie in my movie collection. There are so many movies I own that I have yet to even watch. That needs to end. And if it takes this project to help me get the job done, then so be it. As of right now, I plan to do the watching in some form of alphabetic order, although that might change in the future. So, join me as I begin the task of watching far too many movies. This project will also cover television shows as I get to them. I will just go down each shelf in my collection. Now, let it begin.

Next movie: π

Death Note 2

2009-02-08T16:45:00.003-05:00

First lesson of this movie, turn on the subtitles. I only missed the first few lines of the movie before I could tell what was going on.

The second lesson is that just because you have a computer doesn't mean you should be doing CGI. The CGI in the movie is terrible. It made me wish for the days of Last Starfighter's special effects. Silly Japanese.

Third, it seems if you don't see the first movie, you might not understand exactly what is going on. I had no clue until I pieced it together about halfway through. At least they give the rules of the Death Note at the beginning. So you may not understand who is who, but we can at least understand what the notebook can do.

Finally, it's not actually a bad movie. The movie is able to ramp up some tension, even when you know who Kira, the killer is, and who the police are. Yet the game of cat and mouse is fun, and the plans against each other are fun to see as well.

House Season 1 Episode 4: Maternity

2009-01-09T00:09:00.003-05:00

This episode begins by playing off of the title from two episodes ago. Personally, I thought it was too early to do that but to each their own.

Actually, we start with a newborn baby. Oh, and Sam on True Blood as the father. Unfortunately, he won't be turning into a dog here. The baby spits up, doesn't respnd to the doctor, and has a fever.

Opening titles. House has a great pimp walk in them.

House is busy watching soap operas. The doctors come in talking about the baby, and House decides to take the case.

No one believes House that there is an epidemic starting. Of course, they are all stupid, because House is always right. So, he goes hunting for more sick babies.

The Asian baby with the lesbian mommies is sick. See? Women are evil and will get you sick.

Let's check the white board. Oh, it's just sick babies on it. Care to take a guess?

House decides to start the babies on two medications, which is going to be important in a bit.

More foreshadowing about Cameron's baby. While Cuddy swabs the whole hospital.

House vs Clinic Patient #1: Patient can't lose weight. House tells her she has a parasite. She's pregnant.

The babies are going through kidney failure. House tells them to take one baby off of one medication, and one off of the other. Of course, that means one of the babies will probably die from not getting the proper medication. House gets permission from Cuddy, and the wait begins. Wilson calls Cameron Allison, since she didn't give the lesbians terrible news.

The Clinic Patient returns, trying to get her husband a DNA test by lying about her having Mono and him needing a test.

Angry Cuddy clips a tie that was hanging.

Lesbian baby dies. Because women are evil and don't deserve babies. Especially two of them. No, terrible CGI!

Wilson tells the lesbians their baby died since Cameron could not. But the other baby is also getting sicker.

House decides to do an autopsy on the dead baby to see whether there was heart damage. Virus in the hearts of the babies.So now they have to check the babies' blood for viruses. And then we test the mothers for anti-bodies of what the kids have. Whichever the mothers don't the kids do.

The babies get an anti-viral. The babies get better, but not are not out of the woods yet. House asks Foreman about Cameron. And then he sees Clinic Patient again. Her husband is the father. She's nutty happy. She wants him to do pre-natal or baby delivery. It gives House an idea. The babies are healthy now.

House confronts Cameron about her loss. She calls him a bastard and leaves.

House looks for the cause of the virus. And there she is. The old lady bringing the teddy bears for the babies is sick and coughing. And she's getting the babies sick that way. Bad CGI follows.

Oh, so House's idea? It wasn't about the babies, it was about being able to stay in the OBGYN lounge and watch his soap opera on their TV.

_______

The nice thing with this episode is it had an actual patient die, adding that House can't save everyone. But at the same time, there never is the sense that tensions are ramped up as a result of this. Instead, the doctors remain calm, as though this is something they always go through. Except for Cuddy that is. She shows her frustrations with it. We do get tons with Wilson this episode, and Cameron's loss gets some more referencing, which will lead up to the reveal later on. Not a bad episode, although it does seem to be missing something. Mainly because of the fact that the patients are babies and thus there's not much that can be done with them storywise apart from what is done.

House Season 1 Episode 3: Occam's Razor

2009-01-07T23:08:00.002-05:00

And we start with a kid calling in sick from work. Really, he's in bed with his girlfriend. But he does keep saying he has a cough. And then his girlfriend screws his brains out, which sucks the life out of him, giving us our patient of the week. Lesson, women are all succubi.

Opening credits.

And the girlfriend is staying at bedside with the boy, while Wilson tries to talk House into taking the patient. House, of course, takes it. He wants patients with difficult to solve illnesses, he's just too lazy to look for them.

Let's check the white board: Fever, cough, nausea, rash, low BP, and Abd pain. Have you solved it yet?

Chase is checking to see if the male patient is pregnant. In the chest.

Cuddy appears, and makes fun of House's limp.

House vs the Clinic. The whole clinic. "Maybe I'm too stoned to tell." Heh heh

Girlfriend is scared she banged him sick. See? It's true.

House vs Clinic Patient #1: House helps the woman out by letting her ride her insurance since she's being canned.

Antibiotics are killing the patient. What does it mean? Terrible CGI!

OK, class, add "Kidney Failure" to your white boards. Figure it out now?

Wrong guess #1: Sinus infection and Hypothyroidism

Oh no, parents! At least they can't make decisions for him.

Foreman whines about House. I bet he also never believed in Santa Claus.

Setting up for far in the future. Chase is hot for Cameron.

House vs Clinic Patients #2: House calls for a consult from Cuddy over a man with a sore throat. He has a sore throat.

"Smugness is easier to maintain." House explains why he treats the doctors under him like crap. So they want to work harder.

House vs Clinic Patients #3: Cuddy sends Wilson for the consult. Her leg hurts after running six miles. What could it be? While they wait, they play Metroid.

Cameron tortures Chase by talking about sex some more. And eventually, they will see what it feels like together, but not anytime soon.

They take him to a clean room. And Chase strips him naked. Hey kid, just a hint, if Chase drops the soap, don't bend over to pick it up.

House mentions pulling a toy car out of a nose, foreshadowing for a future episode. Wilson asks "You have a thing for her (Cuddy)?" Eventually, House will fall for Cuddy, big time. He then gets Wilson to order him Vicodin, which gives House an, oh wait, he's just staring at the white board.

Wrong guess #2: Gout. He doesn't have gout, House already knew that. But he had gout medication, as a mistake for his cough medication.

Correct guess: The medication did it!

Now, House has to prove it. The Pharmacist won't admit he made a mistake.

So, they decide to check for lymphoma. And the patient dies. Wouldn't be a House episode without a resurrection.

House vs Clinic Patient #4: Patient has an MP3 player inserted into his rear. House checks out to let Cuddy fix it.

House figures it's from the kid taking Xstacy. Back to the medication doing it. The patient admits to doing the X, and he gets better immediately.

And as House looks for the reason the kid got sick, the kid admits the pills he now has for the cough have a letter on them when the old pills did not. Meanwhile, House finds the pills that poisoned the kid, and can rest easy.

Credits. "That's some bad hat, Harry."

__________

A stronger episode than the last, as each episode so far has gotten better than the last. The actors have all become comfortable with their character, Cuddy actually gets a few scenes, we get to to see House and Wilson actually just hanging out in House's office, and the patient doesn't threaten to leave right before House finds the cure. Also, another thing I liked in this episode is that they did not end up throwing diagnoses at the wall over and over until House finally came up with the solution. Instead, he threw one possible solution out there to start treatment on, while he continued to think of what it might also be.

You can still feel the early series jutters a bit, but the show has grounded itself much more by this episode, keeping away from more of the gimmicks that it started with Another fine episode.

House Season 1 Episode 2: Paternity

2009-01-06T22:49:00.002-05:00

And we start this episode with a fake sport. And a bad CGI shot. Oh, the kid goes down. And hey, isn't that the kid from Eurotrip? Oh no, our first child patient. Grr.

There's the opening we all know and love. With that great music.

House is hiding from Cuddy and the patients. And Wilson has come to talk to House. And we have the patient for the episode.

Wow, House is actually talking to the patient and family.

Night terror! And this is the first dream sequence of the show.

Chase references Huntington's to Foreman, which plays an important part many seasons later in the series.

House vs the Clinic patients continues. Baby coffins.

Wrong guess: MS

And the patient goes missing. Why are all of the lights out at night in the hospital? Usually they leave lights on, in case there is an emergency. Hey, there's Cuddy. And House knows where the kid is. And Chase tackles Dan.

It's not MS. So, they throw more treatments at him.

Wrong guess: syphilis

House vs Clinic patients #2. These always end up being great.

I see Cameron's cleavage. Another symptom. It's not syphilis.

House gets his DNA tests. And he continues his love of General Hospital.

And we have the winner! Dan's mother wasn't vaccinated.

Cleft chin, which the patient knew made him adopted. Oh hey, think House was smart enough to see that?

House is at the Lacrosse game? That's just weird. Even him being there with no one there is weird.

And credits. "That's some bad hat, Harry."

_________

By the second episode, most of the cast feel much more comfortable on the show. They are more of their characters, and the chemistry between them is starting to show. Hugh Laurie, while good in the pilot, really starts to shine as House, and Wilson works much better, where he doesn't feel shoehorned in as a way to get House a patient. Cuddy is still more of an idea of an administrative foil for House than an actual character, and we really don't get more of her than that for some time. Still, a strong episode that shows why House built in popularity and became the monster of a show it did become.

House Season 1 Episode 1: Pilot

2009-01-05T22:28:00.002-05:00

Hey, it's Robin Tunney riding the bus. And now she's running. If I didn't know this show already, I would be wondering who this school teacher was. Oh no, she can't speak, and now she has a siezure.

...What the hell was that? That's not the opening.

And now we meet two doctors. The music is too storybook. And we don't even know who these doctors are (Wilson and House). Oh, and House pops a Vicodin (unsaid what it is).

Oh no, the first of these long CGI trips through a body.

First "Everybody lies". And who are these doctors? We're just thrown right in, no names, but there are relationships.

Who is this female doctor? (Cuddy) She must be his boss.

Oh, his name is Doctor House!

"As the Philosopher Jagger once said, you can't always get what you want."

MAD HOUSE!

Making fun of House not being able to run.

Oh, we know her name is Cuddy because of the name on her door. And we got told Cameron's name by a nurse, and Chase said his. I think we're still missing Foreman and Wilson.

No, not another CG trip! At least this one was quick.

And the first patient death, with Chase making the save with the tracheotomy.

House pops a Vicodin (Which we don't know it actually is.)

Bryan Singer went for too storybook in the lighting.

This is the best part of the episode. House is direct and makes fun of the patients. But he is absolutely right.

That is interesting that the real patient can only see glimpses of House.

Enough with the music.

Cameron's hair is almost pitch black in this episode. It's brown only when it hits the light just the right way.

The first time House tells someone to break into a patient's house.

Oh no, complications arise. And the patient dies again. So, they have to look for something else causing this. And Foreman agrees to do the break in, now.

House gets Vicodin. And some candy. Gives the Vicodin to himself and the candy to the patient.

Oh hey, Wilson? Now we definitely know his name. (And we find out Wilson may have been lying to get House on the case.)

And now House has figured out the winner! A tapeworm!

And now House has to visit his patient to tell her off.

And we learn about House's infarction and why he has a bum leg. I like that they threw this in there now, rather than making it a mystery throughout the season.

And the case is solved, the patient is healed.

House hired Foreman because of his juvenile delinquency, Chase because of his father, and Cameron because she's pretty. Good reasons all around.

And now we know Wilson lied to House to get the case. And House says "I never lie".

And then my favorite part of every episode: "That's some Bad Hat Harry".

___________

And so we end the first episode of House. This is the case of a show where the premise is interesting, and has a great movie director directing the first episode, strong writers and actors working on the show, and yet it starts off rocky. The music doesn't fit, nor does the lighting. You never feel like the place is an actual hospital. None of the characters are fully formed yet. House is the closest, but even then you don't get the full sense of him that you get as time goes on. Cuddy is just the boss who tells him what to do and he ignores. She has no personality whatsoever. Wilson too is more of an idea of House's only friend than an actual person. The team is a bit more fleshed out, with us learning a bit about Foreman, and learning about Cameron more through what she says than in learning about her actual past.

Overall, a strong start to the series, if a bit rocky in places. The episode just doesn't hit like the later episodes do.

Mini Game Review: Guitar Hero 3

2007-11-24T21:37:00.000-05:00

Guitar Hero 3 is the kind of game that can drive you insane playing it. You fight the controls, sliding your hand too far up or down the fret bar. Then again, you get good enough, and you can really have some fun.

For someone like me, who has a hard time getting their left pinky finger to respond to their mental commands, the game still offers a lot of fun. You just have to go into practice a lot. But then when you have hit the notes and beat the damn song, you feel joyous to be on the next song of pain in the assness.

In other words, screw you Knights of Cydonia. I hate your guts.

Strikes suck!

2007-11-23T21:20:00.001-05:00

First, my beloved Office gets killed off due to the writer's strike. Now, every other show is coming dangerously close to running out of episodes. Which means there's going to be nothing new to watch on TV in forever. Oh, yeah, we get a few episodes of Lost that they completed still to come. And I think the final season of the Shield might have been finished before the strike. But what about The Office, My Name is Earl, the final season of Scrubs, Grey's Anatomy, Heroes, NCIS, The Unit, House, and so much more. Especially when the biggest proponents of the strike are those making the most, while the little guys are either getting the shaft, or are deluded enough to believe that by participating in the strike they will get noticed and hired as top tier talents. Not by actually being talents.

Now, maybe a lot of this comes from the fact that I've clawed my way to get everything I have ever gotten in my life and career, so I have no sympathy for people trying to get things the easy way. Or maybe it's because I believe if you are doing something you "love", then you'll find a way to keep doing it, but I have zero sympathy for the majority of the strikers. And I'll have even less when the big name actors and directors with the most pull get their unions to go on strike, trying to double what they get in residuals because they "deserve more" than the writers.

Hey Brad Pitt, why don't you go work at Walmart, then.

A Deconstruction on the Song "White Christmas"

2005-12-01T21:44:00.000-05:00

Or, Bing Crosby is a racist

While listening to "White Christmas", I noticed the racist connotations within the song. don't believe me? Check out the lyrics and see for yourself.

I'm dreaming of a white Christmas

Easy enough to see. He's dreaming of a Christmas of all white people. The next line might as well be "no black people allowed around."

Just like the ones I used to know

Meaning, back before the black people moved into the neighborhood. Now, the neighborhood has been "ghettoized".

Where the treetops glisten,

"From a lynching"

and children listen
To hear sleigh bells in the snow

aka, the police chasing down those black hooligans.

I'm dreaming of a white Christmas

Again, no need to explain this.

With every Christmas card I write

To his fellow members in the KKK.

May your days be merry and bright

Without those bad black people around trying to kill you, rape your wife, and rob your children.

And may all your Christmases be white

May the black people never move into your neighborhood. You don't want them around.

I'm dreaming of a white Christmas

and again, in case you forgot he hated black people.

With every Christmas card I write

Warning people of the evils of blacks, and asking them to join the KKK.

May your days be merry and bright

Bright meaning, of course, "white". because black equals dark and not bright.

And may all your Christmases be white

Keep away from all the blacks. White power! White power!

See? Bing was a racist. we should tear this song down and never let it be played for Christmas again.

Comic Review for 10/10/05

2005-10-10T20:32:00.000-04:00

Young Avengers

What’s it about?

A group of teenagers band together to be heroes in a world without the Avengers. Taking place after Avengers Disassembled, these kids try to fill in where the lack of Avengers has weakened the balance between good and bad.

OK, what’s it really about?

It’s Marvel’s answer to Teen Titans, only good. Teenage versions of the big team book group together to fight crime and bicker amongst themselves.

So, why is it good?

First of all, there is a sense of history, while not being so bogged down in history making it impossible to understand. The characters mesh well together, and allow you to feel for them while keeping them fairly mysterious. And the interactions, with some characters appearing to be familiar, just by their conversations is very well done. So much extra is said about the characters just from how they are interacting with each other. The art is also fantastic. The characters come to life off the page, with distinctive appearances such as Hulkling’s earrings. Plus, the ending to each issue is a great cliffhanger for the next issue. It brings the fun of buying monthly comics to know what is going to happen back.

But I hate everything. Name me something I may not like.

The book is dark. Not just from the art aspect, but the writing has had a dark edge on it. Death and destruction has been the order of the day. Also, there have been some late issues as the series has progressed, with the newest issue taking a little while to come out.

Bottom Line?

Young Avengers is one of the best books being published. Pick it up.

Spam spam spam spam spam

2005-08-22T20:21:00.000-04:00

Lovely spam, wonderful spam.

Don't you just love spam? I do! Spam is great. Now, that's spam, not SPAM the meat substitute product. Why do I mention this? Spammers spamming on a blog which hasn't been updated in over a month and even then had a total readership of maybe five. So, why spam?

It could be stupidity. It could be just a blanket attack without care for what you are attacking. Or, as theorized, they might be going through the "see next blog" link and posting that way. Either way, it sucks.

Weekend Waster

2005-06-16T19:30:00.000-04:00

Organize Your Comic Collection – Here is one of those dangerous things that are perfect for a weekend with nothing else to do. Organize your comics. Depending on your collection size, this may take several weekends, but once done, is a big help if you actually want to go into your comics and reread or just look at them. This is also helpful if you want to go back issue hunting.

The first thing to do, is get a sheet of paper, a computer program, say Word, or something else helpful. While you go through your collection, you want to get everything listed and into order. The best way for this is to number your boxes, and take them to your computer (or your computer to them) and start inputting the issues into your program, so that you can add comics in the middle and put them all into alphabetical order. This is the only way to actually get everything in order. Also, while you input the issues from each box, place those in order. This will make things a bit easier later on. It is also wise to put the first letter of the alphabet contained within the box on the outside of it. Once you’ve gone through your boxes and counted your comics, then you can continue on with the actual organization aspect.

Now, print out your sheet of every comic you own, and grab a pencil. The fun is about to begin. You start with the first comic on your list, find it, and place it in the front of one of your boxes. The easiest thing is to buy a new box so you have one empty box to start with. You move through each of your boxes, placing the comics in order, while you do this, the other boxes should empty out a little. When you need a new box, either try to combine two of the half full boxes, keeping the comics in order, or just pull the issues out of one of the boxes. Eventually, you will begin to empty out boxes the whole way and be able to fill back in the comics that you removed. Now, one thing to try to do is leave at least 2-3 inches open in each box, so that when you get new comics you can place them into the boxes. And write (in pencil) a box number with the letters contained in each box to make this easier for you.

Now, once you are done with the entire list, checking off each comic as you go along (and adding any that you might have missed), what you do is keep a spare box for your new comics. Once that box fills up, you can then place it in the regular boxes. And when one of those boxes fill up, buy a new box and split the full box into halves between the two boxes you now have. This will help make things easier for keeping your collection in order, without having any troubles of mixing boxes, or ending up with boxes and boxes of new comics that need sorting into the old boxes. Either way, next time you do need a sorting, most of your comics will be done, so you can go through them much easier, and have more fun pulling out issues and remembering them for the fun they were.

Good luck, it can be fun!

The DVD Review

2005-06-15T22:16:00.000-04:00

Bad Taste

Every great director must start someplace. They either make a student film that catapults them to bigger and better things. They might make a film for little to no money, using their friends as the cast and doing whatever they can to film their movie. Such is the case with Peter Jackson, director of the Lord of the Rings. Long before he was making millions and adapting Tolkien, he was making alien horror movies.

Filmed over four years on the weekends, Bad Taste stars Peter Jackson and his friends, as they find aliens taking over a small town in New Zealand and turning people into food. It’s an odd, odd movie, which will leave you wondering how anyone could go from this, to Lord of the Rings. Not only did Peter Jackson go on to win awards for Lord of the Rings Return of the King for the same things he does here (direct and write), but Academy Award winner (Editing: Return of the King) Jamie Selkirk also started his collaborations with Jackson as editor in this movie.

Jackson double stars as one of the aliens and as Derek, a member of the aliens named Robert. And any movie with the line “I’m a Derek. Dereks don’t run” and features the director headbutting a seagull has to be brilliant. And it is brilliant. Near the end, the bad guys all turn into their true alien forms, and you can see some home baked alien masks in use. But overall, the aliens aren’t bad looking. And Derek even passes through an alien, in one of the weirdest scenes this side of a Miike movie. It’s insane fun.

But that’s not to mean that it is any good. Bad Taste is bad. In the category of so bad it’s good. The acting is some of the worst you will ever see. The story is more of a collection of scenes that eventually lead somewhere. Then again, any movie where it was filmed over four years, with no set script is going to be like that. Whichever “Actors” were available were filmed, and it shows. But for being a super low budget, first time try, it’s actually pretty interesting. And the effects are damn good, especially for a no budget movie. The most interesting aspect, of course, is the fact that this is the movie that started it all. And watching Peter Jackson grow into the director he became is a very interesting journey. As well as seeing a very skinny Peter Jackson.

The Limited Edition of this movie also featured a documentary “Good Taste Made Bad Taste”. This is interesting in seeing how the movie got made, and listening to everyone talk about it. You also can see some very early special effects Jackson did in his youth. And if anyone wants to know what you need to do to make a movie, see what kind of camera Jackson used. The effects work is very good, and one wonders how it Jackson can superimpose flashes over his fake guns and make it look good, why do Hollywood movies have to have the increased dangers of real guns?

Bad Taste is available. The Limited Edition can be found online for sale at either the Amazon individual shops, or at eBay. The documentary is actually pretty interesting and I would recommend it just for anyone who wants to make a movie but feels that they don’t have the money or resources.

The Comic Review

2005-06-14T23:47:00.000-04:00

House of M starts interesting, but can it collect?

This past week, House of M #1 came out, and while it started with an interesting premise, it also fell into the usual Bendis trap. Lots of talking heads, no action. But here, his characters (at least Magneto) come alive.

But this issue is all set up for the actual House of M. Here, it is the Avengers, old and new, and the Astonishing X-Men deciding whether to kill Scarlet Witch or not. The art is fantastic, and the best part of the issue. But even the writing is a step up from the majority of Bendis work. Still, not much happens until the end, when the changes into the House of M actually take place. It’s an interesting set up, but as a hook to get people reading, only the last page, and their love of Spider-Man might be able to do that. It’s very possible to make this very good, but right now it’s just kind of there.

The one good scene is with Magneto and his children. Magneto must decide whether to let them kill his daughter, as Quicksilver tries to convince him not to. Bendis makes Magneto a human, rather than the evil villain many writers might have written him as. Here, he wants to be a good man, and realizes all of his mistakes, and how that has affected his children. He wants to help Wanda, but realizes that the best way to help her may be to let her die. He is conflicted, and the art is stunning in this sequence.

Overall, this issue is an interesting set up, but nothing exciting or important. It might have been better to jump right into the House of M story, and then flash back to the events that led there.

Editorial

2005-06-13T21:05:00.000-04:00

Is Chuck Austen Really the Devil?

There is a lot of slinging towards Chuck Austen. His writing is considered the worst in the world. People rag on his soap opera stories, his lack of character consistency, and his lack of strong storytelling. But does that make him a bad writer?

Well, OK, it does. But is he as bad as everyone says he does, including Chuck Austen himself? Austen always plays that the fans hate him for no reason. He even went as far as to call himself “JD Finn” at the end of his Action Comics run because “Chuck Austen” was too hated by the fans. Bull.

Austen is a one man publicity machine. And what he does best is play the “underdog” to the “evils” of the online community. And by doing so, he becomes the villain, hoping to be the villain everyone “loves to hate”. Unfortunately, you have to have enough talent to get people to feel that way. John Byrne gets a lot of bad press, but still holds onto some talent. Austen just uses his confrontational behavior to attempt to get people to buy his stuff. Instead, he is a writer of mediocre stories which do not leave a lasting impact with the readers and does not stand out much against all of the quality work out there. But it does not reach that level of bad that makes everyone want to read it. It has too much good in it, but the execution fails. All it would take is more thought, and better execution to make something good.

So, stop your whining. No one wants you to fail, only yourself. Write great stories, and the fans will come. Writing the equivalent of a train wreck may help sales initially, but people merely slow down to watch the wreck as they drive to their real destination, the don’t stop and stay there. You must become something better. Let it all hang out, and prove that you are as good as you say you are.

DVD Review

2005-06-12T19:44:00.000-04:00

Life Aquatic with Steve Zissou – A fun romp through the life of a traveler.

Bill Murray plays Steve Zissou, famed oceanographer…sort of. Zissou tries his best, and looks the part of the hero on his documentaries he produces. But the real Steve Zissou is something else indeed. He’s a man who doesn’t know life. He is unable to connect to anyone, including the person who may be his son.

If you can get through the oddness, you will find the touching story of a man trying to connect with life. He has always been larger than life, and through his son, and the people around him, as well as the loss of someone very close to him, Zissou tries to find that which is missing inside of him. While doing so, there are also many adventures and even a little bit of action, as Zissou does get to play hero. Phenomenal work.

Wes Anderson continues to be at the top of his game, making a movie that is small, while at the same time gives a much larger feel. He invests in the characters, but does so in a way where these individuals never destroy who they are for a joke. They never change their core, and as such their quirks are that much more interesting.

The visual design is interesting, as they went for a “fake” look for the movie. As a movie about a man who is making a documentary (which are always set up as fake by him), this leads an interesting dynamic. What is real from what you see? This film tends to tell you that nothing may be real.

The two disk set is stacked. From the commentary to the making of and the deleted scenes, there is a lot of fun to be had. The commentary takes place from the restaurant the movie was written in. There is the sound of drinks being moved. Servers pass by as the genesis of this film is discussed. The deleted scenes are interesting, as is the Portuguese translated David Bowie songs. The documentaries are fun and informative.

Overall, this is a fun movie that deserves at least one chance. Try it out, you just might like it.

Parody

2005-06-11T23:45:00.000-04:00

THQ Signs New Licensed Game

After the news and footage of the Godfather and Scarface games, comes news of another movie being turned into a game license. In a Weekends Don’t Suck exclusive, we have learned that THQ will be producing a game based off of the hit movie Sudeways. The game, which will feature the voice talent of Paul Giamatti and Thomas Hayden Church returning to their roles, will follow the two friends as they tour wine country, tasting drinks and chasing women.

The main focus of the game will be on the wine tasting aspect. You must use your controller to swirl, sniff, and sip. The difficulty of said actions will be determined by the quality of the wine being tasted. Early reports indicate that the main controls will be using both analogue sticks, in order to properly simulate the motions of the glasses. Other portions of the game will include deciphering the ingredients used in the wine, driving from winery to winery, and as Chruch’s character, hitting on women.

One of the unique factors in the game is the variety of game play. While the wine tasting may take up the majority of game play, the driving portions will be just as important. And as it gets later in the day, and you have visited more wineries, the driving will get much more important and difficult. The other different game play will involve using your charm and knowledge to get laid one last time. This will involve picking the right phrases to say, doing specific movements at certain times, and knowing which women to hit on. Just make sure no one finds out about your upcoming marriage.

What follows is a portion of the press release:

“Travel from winery to winery, searching for the best wine in the West Coast. Taste test from the best wines made. Use your knowledge to discern ingredients and impress women. And search for that one last fling. Enjoy all of this, and more, in Sideways, the game.”

The Comic Review

2005-06-10T21:03:00.000-04:00

Sleeper

This week, the second season of Sleeper wrapped up, ending an awesome comic run by Ed Brubaker and Sean Phillips. There were plenty of twists and turns along the way, including a few at the very end. The good guys get theirs, the bad guys get theirs, but what that is may not exactly be what you expect.

Brubaker has weaved a fantastic story of intrigue and espionage. Every issue features twists and betrayals. All the way up until the end, you never know exactly what will happen, or who is on whose side. Brubaker is wonderful at layering his stories, making each event play into the larger plan of each participant. Some get the advantage, but then the others always come back to press their own advantage. This back and forth action, with the global cat and mouse game, stretches the tension to the absolute limit, and beyond.

But Brubaker really excels at his characterizations. His characters are so complex and full of life, you hate to see one die. And when it gets to the end of the series, you know plenty of them will die. But it is also nice to see those who do not die. Holden does not want to see his friends killed, and so he tries to find ways to get around each of them biting the dust. It does not always work, but it is nice to see a character be conflicted by his actions. Wanting to atone for his evils while committing more evils. These are real, three dimensional characters.

One would be stupid not to mention Sean Phillips. His art brings a fantastic moody atmosphere to the world this takes place in. Dark blacks and faces worn with age define his world. His people are haunted, with their wisdom and age in their eyes. He is one of the top talents working in comics today.

Now, one odd thing in the last issue is the washout effect I noticed. Everything is a light shade of gray, ruining the stunning blacks and losing some of Phillips art. Whether this was a stylistic choice, or just something in the printing, I found it to be lacking. The story though, wraps everything up perfectly, giving enough twists to keep you excited while leaving the possibility open for more stories in the future. This is a must read series.

Sleeper starts with Point Blank, followed by the three Sleeper trades out now, and concluding with the last six issues of Season 2.

You Can Buy THAT For a Dollar

2005-06-09T23:00:00.000-04:00

Blood of the Dragon

(Jimmy) Wang Yu, who was the only actor not seen in the insert yourself into an existing movie for comedic effect movie Kung Pow (unless one counts the credits) is seen in full glory here. He stars as Lung Ti (which from the dubbing is apparently pronounced Long Tie), the White Dragon. He finds a boy who has been given a bamboo tube and charged with delivering it to the Prince. The importance of the tube? Apparently, the rebel forces decided to keep their membership information on the back of a map. Just so, I guess, they knew who all to collect dues from. “Hey, Bob Wang. You owe us your monthly payment of $25 to the rebel forces. It says so right here on my list.” And the map? Must have been so they had the addresses of each of their rebels. Can never be too safe with that kind of information. But things take a turn when the prince turns out to be the son of an old enemy, and Lung Ti gets trapped in a teahouse, injured and being surrounded. And apparently, a small teahouse is so frightening to enter, everyone just waits outside it for Lung to exit. Even though the backdoor is always open. It is, in fact, just a rug covering a wall and everyone knows it is there. But they wait, and wait, and finally, the battle happens. Where not only must Lung Ti battle the forces of evil, but also three end level bosses!

Is it in widescreen? Nope.

Subbed or dubbed? Dubbed.

Great kills: -A man gets a sword thrown through him, tip sticking out the front of his chest, yet still manages to make it to town, pull the sword out and give a container to a small boy before flipping over backwards to his death. –Lung skewers three men on his spear. –Just like a classic episode of Star Trek, watch in awe as everyone in a red shirt bites the dust.

Bad dub: The kid is really annoying, especially when saying he’s blind and in need of money. Shatner style acting abounds. Voices come out of nowhere to say the stupidest things in crowd scenes. Almost makes one wonder if there wasn’t a joke somewhere in it. I can’t believe they actually listed the voice talent as the actors at the end of the movie.

Annoying child sidekick: Yes, there is a child with Lung at almost all times. And he is extremely annoying. Loud, whiny, and full of himself, this little sucker can’t even go five minutes without being caught by someone. And unfortunately, the kid doesn’t get offed as a way for Lung to get angry for revenge.

Bad print: Frequent missing frames or bad red frames plague the movie. But they can’t take away from the fun of the fights.

Child Endangerment: While in battle, when Lung gets stabbed and is bleeding, he makes the child jump on his back in order to stop the bleeding, and continues fighting.

Property damage: No less than three tables at the teahouse get destroyed, yet the owner seems to have an indispensable income, since she doesn’t care.

Alcohol cures everything: When Yung has been stabbed in the back, in order to get back to full capacity, he drinks gallon upon gallon of wine. This helps him prepare for the showdown against 50 soldiers and three boss characters.

Great quotes: “I don’t have time to die right now.” “Roast in hell.” “A man must do what he must do.” – Thank you John Wayne!

A fun movie if you enjoy lots of sword on spear action. The spear tends to slow things down, but does make for some interesting fights. And the bosses all have some fancy type of weapon, like a sword that expands into a whip like device, or a ball and chain. The interesting weapons mix up the fights enough for some fun. And it’s only a dollar.

A Taste of Things to Come: The Comic Review

2005-05-19T21:03:00.000-04:00

This will mainly be for trades of comics that I have either read and are coming out the next week, comics that deserve to be bought, even if it is a week late, or just books to buy or not buy. We'll see.

Amazing Spider-Man: Skin Deep –A good Spider-Man tale, but still lacking the magic.

When JMS first came on Spider-Man, he started strong and powerful. His Spider-Man was fun, exciting, and full of wonder. Since issue 500, the comic has been in limbo. It has floated along, with even the “big” stories being much of nothing. There has been a special thing missing. The feeling of fun has been gone.

Skin Deep tries to recapture some of the fun, but still comes up short. The flashbacks make for an interesting story, as we see the way the characters grew from their childhood days. We see how someone can grow into a man, or stay bitter and resentful. But then it turns to an angry villain tearing up the city, and Spider-Man having to use his brain to defeat the villain. It becomes standard fare, and this story doesn’t have the special spark that can turn the normal story into something great. JMS has been coasting. He doesn’t know how to make normal stories as exciting and different as his big events.

JMS still makes fun Spider-Man stories, but here’s hoping he can go for something else. Maybe he can get his spark back. Maybe something will come to him, but for now, it looks like coasting is the order of business.

A Taste of Things to Come: Editorial

2005-05-18T21:39:00.000-04:00

OK, I think this may be the weak link, and thus the first to get the axe.

Are Heroes Scary, or Role Models?

Dan Didio has stated that he wants people to feel around superheroes the same way he wants to feel around the National Guard. Meaning, that when you would see a superhero, you become paranoid and frightened, afraid that they are coming after you. But, how exactly would that work?

Yes, when you see a police officer, or a National Guardsman, you might feel a tinge of paranoia. You might wonder “Are they coming after me?” “Might they think that I did something wrong?” But, how does that work when talking about Superman? Does Superman just walk down the street busting criminals? Or does he mainly fight supervillains. And if he is always fighting supervillains, or saying hello to normal people, why would you be so afraid?

Wouldn’t if feel more like meeting an NBA player? Watching your favorite athlete week in and out battling the opposing team, and then seeing them in person. You would be awed. You would want to touch them, get their autograph. You would not want to run away from them, hide from their frightening visage. Now, imagine if that basketball game was for life or death. You would not suddenly change your attitudes concerning your “hero”. You would still love them, cheer for them, want to touch them and get your autograph. A superhero is still a role model. They do the right thing. They are not the police, that is made clear time after time in comics, so why is that hard to understand?

Maybe it becomes so when the person does not understand heroes as it is. They do not love the characters and concept. Instead, they are given a job. Maybe even a job they consider “beneath them”. Their “love” is merely for the financial aspect, and so they want to project their own feelings into mediums that do not mesh well with these feelings. But, once you have control, you start to want to take more and more. Absolute power corrupts absolutely. And when you have an entire publishing line beneath you, you have power. But always remember “With great power comes great responsibility”. You have to push beyond your own feelings, in order to see the truth beneath the illusion. You need to be able to make decisions that you may not agree with, and that you may not like, because they are the good decisions. While your way may be good for the short term, you must look beyond that. Come back to the light.

Come back to the right thing.

A Taste of Things to Come: Parody

2005-05-17T19:43:00.000-04:00

Bling Justice – This Fall From FOX

This fall, see a whole new side to the law, with the premiere of the most daring cop show ever.

When rap superstar Jiggly Puff is gunned down exiting an arena after a concert, his life seemed all but over. But through the power of his own will and determination, he not only survived, but recovered. With his vocal cords damaged, making fulltime rapping impossible, he had two choices: Either join a gang to get revenge, or use this experience for something good. Deciding to take his anger and mold it into a force for good he enrolled in police academy, eventually becoming a police officer, and then a detective.

Now, Detective Jiggly Puff wears his bling on the streets, using his knowledge and experience to help get into the seedy underside of gang culture. While he uses his badge to dispense justice to all who break the law. And with the occasional rap, Detective Jiggly Puff is ready to bring about his own kind of justice. BLING JUSTICE!

A Taste of Things to Come: Weekend Waster

2005-05-16T20:09:00.000-04:00

This is merely a small part of a larger idea of mine. This section is for things that you can buy to waste away a full weekend:

Star Wars – With the release of Revenge of the Sith, an easy way to waste your weekend away is to watch the complete Star Wars saga. Not only are all previous five movies on DVD. But you can also pick up the animates Droids and Ewoks shows, the Clone Wars cartoons, and the Ewok movies that were made. Plus if you head out for a convention, you can always also pick up the Holiday Special, and maybe even the Muppet Show with the Star Wars characters.

The Star Wars movies are a fun romp through special effects laden worlds and through differing filming styles of the 70s-early 802 and the 90s-early 00s. These movies are fun, even if you don’t think episodes 1 and 2 are great. There is still a lot of fun, and some battles that make up for it. Even some of the more painful stuff, like the Christmas Special, can still be a lot of fun.

If you are going to watch this before watching Revenge of the Sith, do it in filming order, with the original trilogy first, then the cartoons, and the Ewoks movies, then the new trilogy. This will pump you up for what is to come, as well as not leaving you on too high of a note before the finale. Now, have fun!

A Taste of Things to Come: You Can Buy THAT For a Dollar

2005-05-15T15:48:00.000-04:00

This is a small part of an idea. This part will be dedicated to entertainment that can be picked up for the low low price of $1!

Return of the Street Fighter

Sonny Chiba returns as Takuma “Terry” Tsuguri, an assassin for hire, who won’t kill a fellow martial artist. The events of which lead Tsuguri on a non-stop fight for his life and set in motion plans for the Mafia to rule all of Asia. Tsurugi must murder his way to the top in order to survive. But there are shocks along the way, like the villain of the original movie survived having his throat ripped out and now has an electronic throat. Then again, Tsuguri should have died at the end of the original, so who can complain? Lots of martial arts and violence hold the film together while the story is at least somewhat put together. And Chiba is great as always.

Is it in widescreen? YES!

Subbed or dubbed? Dubbed.

Great Kills: -Tsurugi in handcuffs uses two of his fingers to stab a man in the neck. The man lives, but will never speak again. -Tsurugi punches a man in the back of the head, making his eyeballs pop out. -A woman having sex with Tsurugi attempts to kill him. He bends her arm the wrong way, and participates in more anti-feminism.

Bad Dub: It sometimes sounds like they fired one Tsurugi voice midway through and hired another. Unfortunately, they didn’t record the English track in order.

Annoying female sidekick: Yes there is a female sidekick. Yes, she is annoying, very annoying. It’s not until the end, when she gets rid of that stupid hairstyle, that you feel something for her. Otherwise, she feels like a character used just for laughs.

Alcohol cures everything: Waking up from a half dead sleep, Chiba drinks a bottle of whiskey and spits it on his wounds, healing himself to full power.

What’s in a name? The case says “Sony Chiba” plays “Takuma Tsurugi”. The credits at the end of the movie say “Sonny Chiba as Terry Sugury”. IMDB says “Takuma ‘Terry’ Tsurugi”. Everyone in the movie calls him either Terry, or Tsurugi.

Great Racist Quotes: “You’re just another slant eyed Jap.” “Away from the yellow skinned dog.” “They had an idea, to take over the whole lousy yellow hemisphere.”

It’s a dollar. It’s a fun little martial arts flick that features some cheesy American dialogue and fun action sequences. Overall, pretty good for some martial arts. And the story itself isn’t half bad as well.

God of War: God of Awesome!

2005-03-27T15:00:00.000-05:00

Never believe hype. Oftentimes, a movie, game, or comic will be hyped as the next great thing that people will forget that all it is is a movie, game, or comic. The next crossover is going to be the greatest, most long lasting story ever! This movie will gross more than Titanic. This game is the game of the year. But sometimes, just sometimes, hype can be there for a reason.

God of War starts you out playing as Kratos, a Spartan warrior in the service of the gods. You are immediately thrust into battle against undead soldiers, and the Hydra. Following this battle, you set out for Athens to destroy Ares, the god of war, and reclaim the sanity the mad god stole from you. Along the way, you will pick up weapons from the gods you serve, and fight your way through Pandora's temple to find Pandora's box, the one weapon that will help you defeat Ares. The story is top notch. And the voice acting is nothing to sneeze at either. Every character is portrayed wonderfully, bringing each character to life.

First things first. This game is absolutely stunning. Sometimes you just want to stop and look around you, or watch things in the background. In one part, you have to pass through two giant flapping curtains and then you see Ares(giant sized), battling the army of Athens. And watching Ares in the background while you run is simply breathtaking. Later, you can just stand around watching Kronos wander desert, whether from afar, or from the top of Pandora's temple. The characters are beautifully rendered, and the backgrounds are lush and full of life. Even the blood, gore, and nudity are well done, something a lot of games which use them make them cheap, figuring the audience won't care. But in this game, it is done for a reason, to make the game feel more like the era. This is a beautiful game.

The gameplay is very easy. A few buttons make up the majority of your moves, yet you can do so much with them. It feels natural, rather than having to remember long sequences of different buttons to get moves off. Plus, the "minigames" where you kill a monster make it just different enough. Whether you are pushing a button repatedly, pushing different buttons, or rotating the control stick, you get enough variety here.

The music is inspiring (if a little on the Lord of the Rings side). As is all the sounds in the game. This feels more like a movie than a game, and I would love to have seen a Lord of the Rings style game done like this.

There are some minuses to the game. One, the camera angle can lead to you falling off of narrow walkways many, many times. The camera does its own thing, which can seriously hurt the player sometimes. Especially when an enemy off screen comes flying at you with their attack already in progress. Some people may complain about the game being short, anywhere from 7-10 hours to beat it. But for this type of game, any longer could hurt the player from finishing. And apart from the god mode and other unlockables, there really is no reason to play this repeatedly,unless you want to. Which I think many people may find themselves doing.

Overall, this is an impressive game. And I hope to see a sequel improve upon this worthy title.

Buy it!

Interlude!

2005-03-21T21:50:00.000-05:00

I have started another blog, which will only be for my text comic strip, which can be seen here. http://textstrip.blogspot.com/

I am already a good bit ahead, and will try to stay that way on this. One strip a day. And I will see if I can do it. This blog will remain for any stories I write. I already have one being written. Damn you time!

Now, a story.

Alex got drunk one night, and a girl he knew disappeared. It later turned out that he ate her. But she was delicious, and stopped him from dying, being diabetic and all.

In Memoriam

2005-02-21T00:36:00.000-05:00

One of the big dogs in journalism and writing has passed away. A man known for his unflinching looks and criticisms at everything and anything around him. He was not afraid to show his own failings. In fact, he reveled in them. Through a drug induced haze and a genius bordering on insanity, he built a legend that will live forever on.

Hunter S. Thompson was a man unlike any other. When journalism was supposed to be about being as unbiased as possible, he threw himself full tilt into his stories. He was as much a part of any piece he wrote as were the subjects. He was a unique voice, calling out that this was happening to him, and not to some stranger he would never know. He brought a personalized style to journalism, creating a strange combination of journalism, and auto-biography. And in there he defined a new style of journalism. Gonzo.

But while the gonzo journalism has drifted about as a mere shadow of Thompson, his own tales will live on. A man who was willing to go anywhere and do anything, he was never afraid to admit it. And we should never be afraid to do such things either. He deserves our appreciation, and studying on his unique style. A style which many have tried to copy, but none have been able to master.

HST, this one’s for you.

Headline: Superbowl to Feature Two Teams!

2005-02-06T16:23:00.000-05:00

In a special Ap new bulletin, we have been given information that the upcoming Superbowl will feature not one, but two teams battling for the grid iron glory. In what is sure to be a first, the game will be played with a oblong ball with laces on one side and feature the ball being handed to players and passed through the air. There might even be the possibility of kicking. The NFL would not comment on these rumors as of press time. We did find one excited online fan.

"The Packers r0xx0rs!" said the fan. When told that the Packers would not be in the game, he promptly thre himself off of an overpass.

So, enjoy the game tonight!

Guide to Writing: Chapter 2: Conflict

2005-01-02T19:42:00.000-05:00

Where I continue taking the steps of writing in order to create a story. Can I do it?

Conflict is the next most important thing you will need within your story. The conflicts will stop the character's desire from happening. This is what truly drives the story out for the whole length. A broken down car, a misunderstanding which leads to a break up, and a fight are all conflicts that can get in the way of your main character, and other characters as well. So, a good way to start out a story is to start throwing out conflicts that the character can run into that will stop them from achieving their goal. Here, you can go nuts, but continue to keep it clear and simple. It does not need to be a long explanation for what is happening, merely what will happen. The more conflicts you can come up with, the better. It's always easier to cut down on conflict and have too much happening than not enough. Go nuts!

In my example of a man wanting a quiet date:

-flat tire
-broken down car
-restaurant closed
-robbery
-hostage situation
-sewer monsters attack
-girlfriend gets captured
-must save the city from attack
-phone interruption
-money problems

The list can go on and on. Just remember, depending on what kind of story you are thinking of, as the idea for the story will be there, you are just shaping it, the conflict can get goofier and goofier.

Guide to Writing: Chapter 1: The Idea

2004-12-29T22:35:00.000-05:00

Edited: as they will be until perfect.

Here begins a series of articles for me, just to keep the writing process in my head. Feel free to follow along and join in.

The most important thing to do when writing is to have an idea. Any idea will do, but one must have an idea to begin the process correctly. Or else all you are doing is msking random words jumble together in no real order. Instead, you need a basic idea, a premise for your story. This is literally one line about the basic idea behind your story, One could be "Man comes to grips with the death of his mother." Now, this could describe any type of story. But it gives you the basic starting point for entering your story. This is the idea that the rest of the story will be built around. The premise can be like throwing darts at a wall, anything you want it to be. But the simpler it is, the easier it will be to construct a story.

Now, don't think you have to explain the actual story. It's merely an idea that runs the course of the story. The premise of Die Hard is "A man tries to make up with his wife". It is not about the terrorists, they are just an obstacle in his path. The motive is what you want. Your main character needs a motive. The motive gives you places to go and obstacles to put in his way. Now, every character has some type of motive, but the main character's motive is what drives the story along. Every story needs one. Even yours.

So, first we will come up with the premise. Go ahead, create one. I'll give you time. Don't be afraid.

For my example, I shall use the idea of "A man who wants a nice quiet date." This does not describe the actual story, just a plot point that will be followed throughout the whole story and give the main character a motive. What's yours?

Next: plotting the story!

Waiting for Christmas

2004-12-24T23:45:00.000-05:00

Sitting alone in bed. In the darkness that has held the night. Waiting. Christmas is upon the day, yet it is still too early. Parents still slumber, and the fear that Santa may not have yet come is real. If you are awake, will he come? He has to have already been. Santa knows kids wake up early in anticipation of the big event. You move to get out of bed. Will the parents hear? Will they know? Will Santa magically make the presents vanish when you go downstairs before it is time?

It is best not to think on this. The parents will awaken soon. And when then do... Maybe you should go to the restroom? You can sneak down the stairs a little on the way. Or maybe you need a glass of water. How about that? And then just peak in on the living room full of presents. No one will know.

Well, it's best not to. That time will be here after another few minutes. The clock is ticking away. Don't be afraid to wait. Watch some TV. Play a game on your GameBoy. Read some. Don't be too anxious. You've already made it that far.

OK, bathroom. On the way back you stop and turn to look at the stairs. Right down them and around the hall and you can see it. Take a step towards the room. One foot touches the top step. NO! Back to bed you go.

You lay down. Closing your eyes and trying to sleep is not helping. Time slows down as you wait, and wait, and wait. When will it come? It must come! You look at the clock, and it has only been five minutes. Please, just arrive already. Time. Time.

Wait, is that someone moving downstairs? Yes, they are moving around. They must be up. You run to your door and open it, looking down at the face looking up.

"Not yet," they say.

You sit in your bed, waiting for the time. It is coming. It is coming. What is taking them so long? Making coffee, and putting on the album. The stupid Christmas album you've hated for every year. Why put it on. You are finally allowed out of your room. You can sit on the steps. You hear them moving around. You want to come down. Please?

Finally, you are allowed down the steps, you walk to the room, being held off from the gratification forever. It's torturous. Please, please. You turn the corner and look in, and there are presents everywhere. More than you have ever seen before.

Christmas has come.

'Twas the Night Before Christmas

2004-12-24T17:00:00.000-05:00

'Twas the Night before Christmas
And I was a drinking.
Santa was coming
Or so was I thinking.
Little did I know
Just what was coming.
Santa was on his way
For a little different something.
In a drunken stupor
I left the bar.
Headed out to the parking lot
And looked for my car.
But what to my wondering eye
Did appear?
Saint Nick with a crazed look
That caused me much fear.
He attacked me,
Assaulting me with his sack.
I was knocked for a loop
And landed on my back.
"Why are you doing this?"
I asked with a start.
"I'm low on money for presents
Now give me your heart."
I tried to fight back
But Santa was too strong.
I knew that instant
That something was wrong.
"Why attack this person?
Why try to kill me?
Why must you do so?
I want to help you can't you see?"
"Sorry son", he said
"But I'm tight on money.
There are too may kids.
And my life isn't honey.
So, I steal some organs
And sell them on eBay.
Then buy lots of presents
For all the kids who pray."
It was at this moment
I passed out on the street.
Woke up hours later
Without any heat.
There was a scar on my side
Where once was my kidney.
In a tub of ice I lay
He didn't even give me anything free.
And while tired I was
Trying to lay
I heard him leaving
And heard him say
"On Dasher, on Dancer
On Prancer and Blitzen (who loved football)
On Comet, on Cupid
On Donner (Richard) and Vixen (the hot reindeer)
We've got what we came for
Now let us depart
We've presents to deliver
And we've barely made a start."
And as he flew out of sight
I heard him exclaim as he kept up a pace.
"Happy Christmas to all
And sorry to... what's-his-face!"

Merry Christmas!

Super Happy Fun Story #4!

2004-12-21T20:55:00.000-05:00

Everyone knows it is not fun to be a bastard. The parents knew that. And they wanted their kid to be happy and fun. So they knew what they needed to do.

Responsible, good parents make sure that they are married when they have children. This thought occurred to the couple when they found out. He had gotten her pregnant, the test said so. And they knew they could not dare let their child be born a bastard. That would just be wrong, and being wrong is for bad people. So, they knew what they had to do. They had to get married.

Happy people needing to get married always have to go to the happiest place on the Earth. So, they drove out west. Way out west to the fun city known as Las Vegas! They got to the City of Fun and drove up to a drive through marriage place. Vows were exchanged, and they were married.

This happy, young couple returned home and in a few short months were super happy with the birth of their daughter. Of course, when their parents found out what they had done, they were not very happy. And when they got kicked out of her mother's house and had to quit school to work full time in order to afford a place to live neither was the most happy. And as they aged and took out their aggression on each other neither of them were very happy. And their daughter, growing up in this home of hostility began to become withdrawn, those were not the best of times. But at least they were married, and their daughter was not a bastard. And that is all that really matters.

...Is it just me or have these gotten less and less fun with each story? I promise something new that's not just making fun of someone or something. Promise!

Like, Totally My Own Blog! XOXOXO

2004-12-20T21:54:00.000-05:00

So like, last night. I was all like, out with this boy. And my dad was soooo pissed at me for dressing the way I did. But I was all like, this is how all the girls are dressed. And he was all "I'm not having no daughter of mine dressing up like a street walker." And I was all "I have to walk down the street dad. I'm going to the mall." But he made me go and change. I wish I had cool parents. They don't understand. I was only wearing a skirt and half shirt. It's not like I was naked or anything. So anyway, I got to the mall, and he was there waiting for me. So we went to the food court and had dinner. I wanted a hotdog but he wanted pizza so we had pizza and it was soooo good. Mmmmmm. And then we went to see this movie. But I guess his seat hurt because he kept leaning over to me and putting his arm around me. It was so annoying! I like must have missed half the movie. I was so mad I spilled my coke and made him get another. Stupid boys. So we went over to his house afterwards, so I could have that hotdog I wanted earlier. He said he would get me a special one from his house. But when we got there he just wanted to sit on his couch and wouldn't make the hotdog. He was just holding me. And then he wanted to kiss so I was all aflutter and we started kissing but he tried to stick his tongue in my mouth. GUROSS! I told him I don't know what kind of freak he is but I am so totally not like that. And then he said he wanted to go putt putt. Now, I don't know what kind of sick code word that is but as I told him I am 13 years old and I will not do sick things like putt putt on the first date. Maybe when I'm old, like say 15, I might. But no way while I'm still you. And then he got all mad because he's 15 but as I told him, older guys are cool. But he told me to go home and he would putt putt with his guy friends. i told you he was gay. Wanting to do whatever that is with his guy friends. I am sooo over him now. And then I went out and bought a new cd. Yay!

A Short Play

2004-12-19T16:00:00.000-05:00

Enter Ted

Ted

I can't wait for tonight. Going out to see a movie. Maybe dinner, maybe dancing. This will be the best night ever. Once everyone arrives. Now where are they? It's alomst five already.

Enter Steve

Steve

What are you bitching about now, Ted? Everyone will be here. You know none of them ever arrive on time. And your girlfriend is the worst.

Ted

Oh, like yours is much better? I think she purposefully sets her watch back just to make sure she is never on time.

Steve

Well, it's not like there aren't any other people coming around. There's Alex, and Dave. And they better show up soon.

Ted

Well, they better get here. Or else, we'll just leave without them.

Steve

We're not leaving without them. They are our friends. And you will never have sex again if you leave without Sarah.

Ted

Oh, yeah. Well, I guess we'll wait then.

Steve

Good then.

Enter Michelle (Steve's girlfriend)

Steve

Hey, sweetie.

Michelle

Hey honey. And how are we?

Steve

Fine. Fine. Just waiting for everyone to get here.

Michelle

Oh, they are just coming. Sarah is right outside. And I saw Alex pulling in.

Ted

So, where's Dave?

Enter Sarah

Sarah

He's coming, OK silly?

Enter Alex.

Alex

Hey guys, we ready to go?

Ted

Once Dave decides to arrive.

Sarah

Stop being such a worry. He'll be here in just a minute.

Steve

Calm down dude. He said he was coming. He'll be here. I bet he'll show up in the next few minutes.

Ted

You wish. He's not coming. Someone always has to ruin my day.

Michelle

You're the only one who ruins your day. The rest of us are having a fun time. Who cares if we are a little late? At least we are together, having fun.

Enter Dave

Dave

We ready to go now?

Ted

Yep, let's go.

Exit All

The End.

Secret origin of TheLewisShow!

2004-12-17T17:17:00.000-05:00

One day, Mikey was in his secret lair, deciding on what possible course of action to take in his plans to conquer the world. He had tried every day, for days on end, all without success. But each day brought the hope that this day would be the day he would finally rule the world. And thus he worked tirelessly on and on. This day was no different, with the new plan being to build a giant robot to destroy cities with until the leaders of the world all surrendered. His plan would be a good one, he could tell this time. He would succeed!

"Vel," he said, calling his lovely assistant into the control room for his underground lair.

She walked into the room, carrying two large cups full of soda into the room with her. He only enjoyed drinking his sodas, as he felt they stimulated his brain for his world conquering dreams. Dreams which would become a reality. And he would finally get his assistant to fall in love with him and they would get married. It was all planned out.

"Tonight Vel," he said, "we take over the world!"

He sipped on his drink, looking over his paperwork. It was all perfect. Everything would work exactly as he thought it would. He reached over and pressed the large red button on his control panel. No, not that red button, the other one. Yeah, the one which caused the front wall of the room to slide to the side, revealing the hangar on the other side, with the giant robot in it.

"And then what?" she said.

"I... rule the world?"

"And then?"

"Then... then nothing. I rule the world."

"But, isn't there something else we can do?"

"Uh- um- uh... Let's go!"

He stood up and walked around the control panel and into the hangar. She followed closely behind him, muttering under her breath.

"What is it?" he asked.

"Nothing, just nothing."

"What?"

"Well, I was kind of hoping that you would say that after we take over the world, that we would, you know, get married."

"Get... married? You mean, you want to marry me?"

"Well, of course, I do love you."

"You do? Well, why didn't you ever tell me?"

"Because I didn't think you loved me back. You were always so interested in taking over the world."

"I was interested? I only wanted to take over the world in order for you to fall in love with me. I always thought you wanted a strong man. Someone who could, you know, rule the world. I thought you needed to be given the world."

"No, silly. I only was here because of you."

"Well, then why are we trying to take over the world?"

"I don't know."

"Hmmm. Vel, marry me?"

"Of course."

And so the two turned around and went back into the secret lair. He looked around as he pushed the red button. No, the one he had already pushed, which caused the wall to slide back into place. He looked around the lab, knowing that he would not need anything in it now.

"I guess I'll need a new job then," he said.

He flipped the first light switch, moving down the line, turning off each one. The rooms in the laboratory darkened as he reached the last light switch, with the stairs leading out right beside it. He turned to look around in the darkened lab. He was slightly sad to see the whole idea go away. He did have fun trying to take over the world. But he had made his choice, and he would live with it now.

"I must become a new man to make this work," he said. "And with being a new man I will need a new name. I can no longer be known as Mikey. From now on, I must be something new, something normal. I must pick a name that will allow me to fit in with normal life. I shall be... TheLewisShow!"

With that, he switched off the light, and headed up the stairs after his new fiance. The lab sat silent, hoping one day he would return to finish his work.

Super Happy Fun Story 3!

2004-12-16T20:10:00.000-05:00

He felt sick. He knew he should not have been drinking so much but he did so anyway. And thus was born the vomit. He was sick.

Drinking is fun. But all good little boys and girls should never drink too much. If they do, they will get sick. And that is never fun.

This was not fun. He hugged the toilet. He was going to expel the contents of his stomach. He could feel the chicken he had for dinner. There was that snack he ate in the middle of the day. And there were the thirty beers he had drank.

Drinking thirty beers is fun. Passing thirty beers back up is not as fun. He vomited once. The contents of his stomach spilling into the bowl. Being sick was not fun. He was not having any fun at all.

He promised to never drink again if he could stop this vomiting. He vomited again. Sick, he felt horrible. His head pounded and he slipped off of the bowl and smacked his face on the floor tiles. Vomit covered his mouth.

This was not fun at all.

Maybe it should be more fun.

He got back up, and an egg popped out of his mouth. The egg floated in the bowl, cracking and busting open. The baby dragon jumped out of the egg shell and sat on the bowl. It growled at him, then spit flame out of its mouth. He jumped back, scared and started trying to run. He slipped and smacked his head on the floor.

The dragon began to grow. It got larger and larger, smashing through the ceiling and destroying the house He turned around to look up at the giant creature. The dragon looked down, opened its mouth, and incinerated the man. It then scooped up his carcass into its mouth and ate him in one gulp.

Lesson: Never drink unless you can handle your alcohol.

CBR party!

2004-12-15T22:44:00.000-05:00

Alex loves the cock.
Brian Conin des not, as he is straight.
Cosmic Cat is female, but she is too young to love it.
Dan Apodaca loves his ass, Phillip, instead.
Ed Cunard has no idea what is going on.
Fabian does though, because he is cool.
Greg Hatcher feels embarrassed, and leaves.
Howyadoin does not believe in embarrassment. He would rather laugh at the misfortune of others.
I_mmmchocolate wonders what she is doing there, being a female in a sea of dorks.
Justin Davis does not know who these strange people are.
Kmeyers is too high to care.
Loren feels out of place. Until he gets spiffy new glasses and becomes a sexy beast!
Matt Bib gets really wasted, and wakes up in a dress.
Nicole Lee is only there because she is Brandon's girlfriend and has to go with him to the party.
Orchid Thief had been Mike Smash's girlfriend, but she went to the party anyway because they are still friends.
Pol Rua is a friendly munkey. And everyone loves the munkey.
Quarterwolf shows off his new skinny self. Everyone loves it.
Rallura congratulates Quarterwolf on his weight loss.
Smoogis cries, because Quarterwolf is getting attention even though he has been mean to her. And she is too young to think about the cock as well.
Tadgh Adams loves Alex, but not in the same way.
UniqueFrequency is just someone who started with the letter U. Hey, they can't all be winners, now can they? Geez, what is it you people want from me? Why can't I be loved?
Valmore decides to tell everyone how he has a girlfriend, to make the rest feel bad for themselves.
Wesley Dodds leaves in a hissy fit. Because he can.
Xombie is around for the letter X. What? Two out of twnety-six aren't bad. Oh, and everyone confuses him with zombie.
Yellowrosegoddess is there just to fill out the female quotient. The sassuage party was getting a bit nasty.
Zombie just came to listen to the music.

And thus was the first CBR party held. Maybe next time they will invite more than one person for each letter of the alphabit, bastards.

Happy Fun Story 2

2004-12-14T01:51:00.000-05:00

One day, there was a boy and a girl. The girl loved the boy very much. As did the boy love the girl. So, they decided to do what any boy and girl who fall in love do.

But this was the girl's first time. And the boy had only done it once before, so he was still pretty nervous.

"I wish Trojan Man would come to help us out," the boy said.

"Silly, he's not real," the girl said.

So the boy sighed and removed his shirt. The girl laughed at his skinny body as she pulled her own shirt over her head. He smiled as she unclasped her bra and let loose her wonderous orbs of flesh.

"Fun!" the boy said.

"Yes it is," said the girl.

The boy fell on the girl, ready to have fun. He pulled his pants off and she did hers. They were now ready to do what people in love do.
So, they did it. He entered her like a happy ducky. A submarine entering happy caverns of love. Happy, pink caverns of love. Which erupted like a volcano. And the submarine shot it's missles into the cave in response.

Finished, the boy flopped beside the girl. He was happy, and she was happy, because they had done what every good boy and girl in love are supposed to do.

"That was great," the boy said, obviously feeling good.

"Yes," the girl said, "Although I did not seem to enjoy it that much."

The boy smiled, for they had done the thing all boys and girls in love did, and that was all that mattered.

The Champions

2004-12-13T23:42:00.000-05:00

They stood tall and proud. Two titans of their age. In the middle of the ring they watched, stared at each other. No one else mattered during those minutes. No one else existed in the world. The two monsters began to circle, studying every move, looking for any weakness, any opening. Neither found any. They were the perfect specimens, at the top of their game. And the winner here would truly be the greatest in the world.

The first step is taken. It gets matched. Moving closer, step by step, the gladiators find each other. The war begins. A battle beyond any and all description. The fought hard and bravely. Each one giving no quarter. Neither faltered. They stood strong. The fought bravely. As the minutes ticked by, they began to feel the exhaustion setting in. The goliaths pounded and pounded, running on fumes. Their adrenalin all used up. Legs weakened. Arms tired.

One wild swing, and it spelled doom. The opponent took advantage. One slip up, one mistake, was all it took. The opponent closed in for the kill. The predator hunting his prey. One quick burst of strength and it was over.

There was one champion standing proud that day. He was no longer one of only two men in the world. Now, there was a crowd around him. Cheering. He smiled, victorious and soaking in the experience, the energy. Adrenalin flowed back into strained muscles. The other man was forgotten. He was no longer a champion. There was only one man left now, and he was a king. He stood tall and proud, knowing his time was limited. There would always be a bigger dog to knock him off of that mountain top. But for now, it was his.

Happy Fun Story 1

2004-12-12T17:51:00.000-05:00

One day, two boys and three girls were walking down the street. They were happy, as happy as people could ever possibly be. But there was something dark brewing beneath their happiness. They would have to cross the street!

"Oh no," the first boy said, "We will have to cross this dangerous street."

"Indeed," the second boy said, "the street is dangerous. There are fast moving cars which could kill us in an instant."

"But if we stay safe," the first girls said, "And follow all safetly rules."

"We can cross the street safely," the second girl said.

"Yes," the third girl said, "Safety is the key."

So the group of five friends first looked right, then left, and then right. But there were cars coming. That meant they could not cross. So they waited while the cars drove on. And more cars came and drove on the street. The first boy grew imaptient.

"We can make it if we run between the cars," he said.

"No," the second girl said, "If we do that we are not being safe. And not being safe leads to being dead."

But the boy would not listen. And he started runnig across the street. He almost got hit by a few cars on his way over, but eventually made it to the other side. He turned around and started waving to the crew across the street. But they would not cross, for there were cars still coming...

Seventy years later the man was now walking down the street to that corner. There, four elderly people stood, waiting for the cars to stop coming so that they could cross the street. He laughed as he crossed the street, weaving in and out of the cars on the street.

Some people need to learn to take chances, he thought.

The Dead Deal

2004-12-12T05:30:00.000-05:00

The man was dead. The gun sat in his hand, as he looked down at the dead body who had once been his friend. A split second and a little pressure changed all of that. The shot had been sudden,loud. The effects were sudden and violent. The man fell to the floor, blood pouring from the wound and life quickly fading away. He could not help but think of how it came to this.

It had been several days since he found out. His own friend had cheated him. They entered a business idea together, and somehow while he had would up losing the money, his friend had gained $200,000. The anger had boiled over as his friend kept getting harder and harder to get in touch with. The gun he had for several years, but it was the first time he had pulled it out of it's case. The anger was boiling, his face turning red. And he knew he would get revenge.

A quick phone call and a meeting was set. He knew he was going to do it. And now, the deed was done. There was no turning back.

The gun had been louder than he thought, so loud. He knew someone had to have heard. And someway the police would find out and be coming. But he was frozen in his place, staring at the body. There was so much blood. His once friend was dead. He tried to move, the gun fell from his hand. It clacked against the pavement and came to rest on its side. Disarmed, he turned to go. Then, the sirens started ringing in his ears.

The police arrived fast. Cars pulled into the alleyway and men in blue uniforms exited the sides. Guns were drawn and pointed at him. He reached down to pick up his gun, wanting to get out. He never had the chance. The tackle drove him to the ground, his hands locked behind his back. He would not get an easy way out. Instead, he would live a long life still, where everyday he would think of nothing but of this day, and the mistakes made...

More Blogs

2004-12-12T04:45:00.000-05:00

More blogs are the greatest thing in the world. Because that means I have more places to ignore and not do anything. Well, mainly, I just wanted to be able to post comments on others' blogs and have my name. Still, cool either way.

Now, a story

When a man loves a woman they can get together and make these things called "babies". These babies grow up to become another man or woman. Then, they repeat again and again making the circle of life. But this is not alwas the case.

Sometimes, the man or woman becomes "gay", and not happy, but instead only can not make babies by coupling with their soulmate. This is different but still OK.

So one day, the "gay" and the "straight" were walking down the street. The one knew that he might have a chance to reproduce and continue the circle of life, the other was thinking about trying addoption. A bus drove up over the sidewalk and hit them, killing them both.

The End.

Incomplete Thoughts

From π to Zack and Miri: Part 19: 24 Season 1 3:00PM-4:00PM

From π to Zack and Miri: Part 18: 24 Season 1 2:00PM-3:00PM

From π to Zack and Miri: Part 17: 24 Season 1 1:00PM-2:00PM

From π to Zack and Miri: Part 16: 24 Season 1 12:00PM-1:00PM

Christopher Chance vs the Pulp Trope

From π to Zack and Miri: Part 15: 24 Season 1 11:00AM-12:00PM

From π to Zack and Miri: Part 14: 24 Season 1 10:00AM-11:00AM

From π to Zack and Miri: Part 13: 24 Season 1 9:00AM-10:00AM

From π to Zack and Miri: Part 12: 24 Season 1 8:00AM-9:00AM

From π to Zack and Miri: Part 11: 24 Season 1 7:00AM-8:00AM

From π to Zack and Miri: Part 10: 24 Season 1 6:00AM-7:00AM

From π to Zack and Miri: Part 9: 24 Season 1 5:00AM-6:00AM

From π to Zack and Miri: Part 8: 24 Season 1 4:00AM-5:00AM

From π to Zack and Miri: Part 7: 24 Season 1 3:00AM-4:00AM

From π to Zack and Miri: Part 6: 24 Season 1 2:00AM-3:00AM

From π to Zack and Miri: Part 5: 24 Season 1 1:00AM-2:00AM

From π to Zack and Miri: Part 4: 24 Season 1 12:00AM-1:00AM

From π to Zack and Miri: Part 3: 12 Monkeys

From π to Zack and Miri: Part 2: 3 Extremes

From π to Zack and Miri: Part 1: π

From π to Zack and Miri: The Start

Death Note 2

House Season 1 Episode 4: Maternity

House Season 1 Episode 3: Occam's Razor

House Season 1 Episode 2: Paternity

House Season 1 Episode 1: Pilot

Mini Game Review: Guitar Hero 3

Strikes suck!

A Deconstruction on the Song "White Christmas"

I'm dreaming of a white Christmas

Just like the ones I used to know

Where the treetops glisten,

and children listenTo hear sleigh bells in the snow

I'm dreaming of a white Christmas

With every Christmas card I write

May your days be merry and bright

And may all your Christmases be white

I'm dreaming of a white Christmas

With every Christmas card I write

May your days be merry and bright

And may all your Christmases be white

Comic Review for 10/10/05

Spam spam spam spam spam

Weekend Waster

The DVD Review

The Comic Review

Editorial

DVD Review

Parody

The Comic Review

You Can Buy THAT For a Dollar

A Taste of Things to Come: The Comic Review

A Taste of Things to Come: Editorial

A Taste of Things to Come: Parody

A Taste of Things to Come: Weekend Waster

A Taste of Things to Come: You Can Buy THAT For a Dollar

God of War: God of Awesome!

Interlude!

In Memoriam

Headline: Superbowl to Feature Two Teams!

Guide to Writing: Chapter 2: Conflict

Guide to Writing: Chapter 1: The Idea

Waiting for Christmas

'Twas the Night Before Christmas

Super Happy Fun Story #4!

Like, Totally My Own Blog! XOXOXO

A Short Play

Secret origin of TheLewisShow!

Super Happy Fun Story 3!

CBR party!

Happy Fun Story 2

The Champions

Happy Fun Story 1

The Dead Deal

More Blogs

and children listen
To hear sleigh bells in the snow